Spoils of War
by PureBlood Alchemyst
Summary: There will always come a time that we would regret the things we didn't do immediately. This is Harvey's regret. But this is not his story. It is Mike's.
1. The Beginning

He should have expected this. He should have known.

― * ―*― * ―

_Three Months before_

― •―

"Donna," Mike started, "I need a favour."

Donna started to speak, but Mike talked over her.

"I know that you hate me right now, but this is more important. I don't care if you don't use it, but just take it as a gift." Mike says to Donna. This clearly threw Donna off her track, because she didn't say anything immediately.

Donna found her voice a moment later, "And how is that supposed to be gift? I thought that you were trying to get Harvey's forgiveness, but bribery will never work on him."

"It's not a bribe," Mike says. "It's a farewell gift. I've given back my office, and I've handed Louis and Jessica my letter of resignation, effective immediately. I'm leaving and I wanted to help before I go."

"Go?" Donna asks. "What do you mean go? I thought you wanted Harvey's forgiveness. If you leave then that's never going to happen then."

It was that question that derailed Mike. His time is running out and he knows that what he has will never be enough to fix his mistake, but he wants to try. If it doesn't work, then he'll leave a broken man, but at least he'll leave knowing he tried to fix everything.

"You think I don't know that?" Mike asked, defending himself. "I know that this will never fix anything, and my leaving will make it even more unfixable, but I need to leave. I can't handle this anymore."

Donna's face remained carefully blank. He wasn't going to get anything from her expression. He left the blue folder with his findings on her desk. The ball has already left his court; it is Donna's turn now.

"If you choose to use it, be my guest. I won't force you to. But tell Harvey that I'm sorry and I have to do this." Mike says as he leaves.

― •―

He passed by his desk as he was leaving. There wasn't anything particularly important to him on his desk, except for a few photos of him and Harvey and him and his gram. He wonders if anyone would notice if he left. Mike doubted that anyone would even care. He never made any real friends here. Too busy with work, and the antagonistic feelings of his co-workers for him from being Harvey's associate, left no doubt that he would never have made friends with anyone in the bullpen.

He wonders why he ever took the job. He knew that time was against him and he was hanging by the hair. It's been a six months since he found out and his time's is coming to an end.

He knew that one day everything would blow up in his face. That day has come, and he knows that he wouldn't survive it fully intact.

― * ―

Harvey valued loyalty over everything else.

Once he hired Mike, he expected that the kid wouldn't betray him. But apparently, he was wrong.

― •―

It was a little past ten when he arrived at Pearson Hardman _(Darby now – don't forget)._

He passed by Donna as always with a hello. But something made him stop in his tracks. Donna never looked dishevelled, she was the prime example of a woman in control, but today she just simply _wasn't_. He had to know why.

"Mike asked me to give you this." Donna says before Harvey could say anything.

"What's this?" He asks as he took the blue folder Donna handed him.

"That's everything you need. He asked me to give it to you," was her answer.

"Is this supposed to be a bribe? I didn't think he stooped that low."

"It's not a bribe Harvey. He made that quite clear when he handed it to me this morning."

"Where is he then? Not brave enough to hand it to me himself?" Harvey asks with a carefully blank mask.

"He's gone." Donna answered.

"Gone? What do you mean gone? It's only ten, he should be in the bull–"

Donna cut him off.

"He's _gone, _Harvey. He told me he handed his resignation already."

Harvey's thoughts were buzzing through his head. Nothing made sense anymore. Mike wouldn't just _leave_.

He looked at Donna, wondering if she knew this would happen, but the look on her face told him that this completely blindsided her. It didn't make sense. Donna should have known. Donna knew everything.

But apparently, the world likes to prove him wrong sometimes.

― * ―*― * ―

― •―

It started one week ago, when he felt out-of-breath just pedalling from his apartment to the store a couple of blocks away. He never got out-of-breath. He could bike from his apartment to Pearson Hardman without even breaking a sweat and the office was at least five blocks away. The second clue was when he had trouble concentrating. Sure he could still do stellar performances for Harvey, but he needed to physically make himself focus on the paper.

He knew something was up so he scheduled an appointment the following day with Dr Grey at New York Presbyterian Hospital to fix the bug that he seemed to have caught.

Two days after, Dr Grey called him asking him to come to his office. Mike left Pearson Hardman as soon as he could and what greeted him at the hospital was not something he particularly wanted to hear. Dr Grey found a tumour in his lung.

_It was a small tumour, _his doctor said_; we might have a chance. But we have to run test to find out if the tumour is malignant – which means it's cancerous and practically irrecoverable, or if it's benign – which means it can be cured. Chances are if it is malignant, we might only be able to slow the damage. It's a slim chance but we have to take it if you want to survive._

And because it was him, it _was _malignant. It was even already in Stage II for Small Lung Cancer. There was no turning back now. He just had to breathe and keep moving on with what is remaining of his life.

It was a slow process doing treatments. He tried to not do them, but that little voice inside his head was making him do it just for the sake of living out what he has left. What pushed him though to do treatments was what he lost with Harvey. He didn't have to keep up appearance anymore at work so he started the treatments.

― •―

Mike listed down Harvey as his emergency contact, ever since his grandmother died. He also gave Harvey power of attorney if he ever succumbed to his disease. Harvey is the only person Mike trusts to make the right decision for him if he can't make it himself.

He didn't want to write a will. It made the disease even more real. He remembered that Harvey always said to make everything concrete and irrefutable, so he made one. He didn't really have any personal effects, but he left everything to Harvey. He knew that Harvey would know who to give them to.

― * ―

There were a handful of people that could claim that Harvey cared about them. His brother Will and Donna were the only ones left of those handful of people. But what he didn't expect, when Mike Ross came barrelling into his interviews for an associate with a briefcase full of weed, was that he'll come to care for this kid like a brother. It completely blindsided him one morning when he realised it. He didn't let it get to him though. So what if he treated the kid a little nicer, it's not like anyone noticed anyways.

He didn't see this coming though. Not even from afar.


	2. Chapter 2

― * ―*― * ―

_Present Day_

― •―

Time has a funny way of moving faster when someone doesn't have the pleasure of spending it anymore. It moves faster and faster until it comes to a complete stop. Time waits for no man, but man always waits for time.

Time is a relative idea; it moves in different ways and in different patterns for every man. It can be swift and it can be slow. It can be a friend and it could also be an enemy.

Time is and always has been but an invention of humanity.

There was a time that Mike thought that his future was set all he had to do was walk on it. There was a time that he thought he might be able to pursue his dreams and have a family of his own. But they all came crashing down.

Fate has it out for Mike ever since his parents died. He made bad decisions and bad friends. He got kicked out of college just as he was at the verge of fulfilling his every dream. Maybe it was just some sort of consolation that Mike was hired by Harvey, something that fate sent as a balm to soothe all the wounds that it inflicted on Mike. But it had a price and that price was something that was more than he could – _was willing _– to pay.

Harvey tried his best to keep moving forward. He buried himself in work in order to ignore the quietness that is Pearson Darby now that Mike is gone. He didn't ask for another personal associate and Jessica didn't push him to get one either. Sometimes he still expects Mike to come to his office with his unending cheer and youthful exuberance, but then he'd just shake his head and get back to work, ignoring the pitying looks that Donna would send his way.

― •―

Walking became a sort of relaxation technique for Mike. Whenever he walked he could sometimes delude himself in the idea that he was normal, that he had his future just waiting for him. But he knew that having false hope would just hurt him in the long run.

Sometimes he'd go to Central Park and just sit there. Watching a couple of kids playing made him realise that the world would still move even when he died. He sometimes wonders if anyone would mourn when they find out that he died already. It was morbid to think about his death but he couldn't help it, it would be the end of everything and there would be no coming back from it.

― * ―

Harvey tried his best to keep moving forward. He buried himself in work in order to ignore the quietness that is Pearson Darby now that Mike is gone. He didn't ask for another personal associate and Jessica didn't push him to get one either. Sometimes he still expects Mike to come to his office with his unending cheer and youthful exuberance, but then he'd just shake his head and get back to work, ignoring the pitying looks that Donna would send his way.

He would never admit it, even at gunpoint that he came to care for his associate, and dare he call it, friend. He never wondered what brought it on. He figured it out moments after Donna told him. What Harvey perceived as betrayal, was Mike's way of helping him. He thought that Mike wouldn't take it seriously when he said he didn't want to see him again. He didn't expect that Mike would take it to heart.

― •―

One day when he was in the car, on the way to a client meeting, they passed by Central Park. Harvey thought that he saw, at the corner of his eye, Mike walking at the pavement. He thought it was trick of the light so he curbed the desire to look back and ignored the impulse to tell Ray to stop the car. He's been seeing Mike practically everywhere and it is driving him crazy. He never showed it though; everyone thought that he was still the same Harvey Specter that everyone admires yet hates at the same time. No one saw through his mask, only Donna could see the pain and sadness on his face because she always knew and she felt it too.

― * ―*― * ―

Pearson Darby is still the same. There wasn't any significant change in the atmosphere with Mike Ross leaving for unknown reasons. Work continued on for everyone except for Harvey, Donna, and Rachel. For them, they still felt the emptiness of Mike's disappearance from Pearson Darby. Even the associates noticed Harvey Specter trying to live up to his name. He was a spectre that no one saw. Any and all of the work that he needed done were ran by Donna and none of the associates or paralegals saw him. Until three days later when they saw him rushing from his office to get to the lifts.

― * ―*― * ―

_Three days later_

― •―

Mike was always at the hospital at exactly 2.00 pm every day for the last three weeks for chemotherapy and radiation for four days per week. His cycles for chemotherapy last for three and a half weeks and a month in between. It was difficult to say the least to follow a routine when for the last year and a half he didn't even _have_ a routine. All he did day and night was following what Harvey and/or Louis was making him do. However, he made sure though that he would be there on time for his treatment. It was not something that he could be late for.

He usually takes a cab to get to the hospital, but he had spare time so he just walked to the hospital. Nearly every day, Mike would catch himself thinking of what ifs. It was a bout of melancholy that would make him consider not taking the treatments anymore. But then he'd catch a glimpse of a picture of Grammy, and he's think that she would want him to try to live. Even today, with him walking, he would drift to his what ifs again. Because of it, he didn't see the pedestrian light going red, or the car speeding towards him.

― * ―*― * ―

Harvey wasn't doing anything in particular. He was just standing by his windows overlooking Manhattan. It wasn't really a surprise when he had a call; he always gets calls from clients. What was different was that the number wasn't any he could recognize.

"This is Harvey Specter."

"_Mr Specter, we're calling you on behalf of a Mr Michael Ross. You were listed as his emergency contact."_

"What's happened?" Harvey stood up from his chair and motioned for Donna to come inside.

"_We're not allowed to divulge any information over the phone. However he was involved in a car accident at Madison Ave."_

"What hospital is he in?" Harvey was already up and nearly running towards the elevators with Donna at his heels even before the woman finished her sentence.

"_He's in Lenox Hill at 77__th__ Street."_

"Thank you."

After hanging up he told Donna to call Ray.

"He's waiting for you outside already," was Donna's immediate reply. "I've also moved all your remaining appointments for today."

Sometimes Harvey wondered how he came across Donna. She was a Godsend when he couldn't think properly.

"What's happened Harvey?" Donna asked him. It wasn't everyday that she saw Harvey this frazzled, no, she has _never_ seen Harvey this frazzled.

"It's Mike. He's in the hospital. There was an accident and I was listed as his emergency contact." Harvey answered her. "I didn't even know that I was his emergency contact."

"Of course Mike would put you as his emergency contact." Donna said. "He didn't really have anyone did he, and he practically saw you as family anyway."

He didn't have time to think about what Donna said anymore because they arrived at the hospital already.

― * ―*― * ―

Mike was barely coherent when the medic was asking him questions. It took all his might to not pass out and when he tried to answer the medic all that came out from his mouth was a whimper.

He felt the man put something on his neck. He tried to fight the darkness that was slowly filling his vision, but he couldn't anymore. The last words that he heard were the medic telling him that he'd be at the hospital soon. After that he couldn't fight anymore and instead he welcomed the darkness that was filling his vision.

His last thought was that he never got to talk to Harvey and that maybe the cancer wouldn't be the reason of his death.


End file.
